Week 117? – Losing Motivation

I remember it happening to the first adult ballet blogger I ever religiously followed, Adult Beginner – It’s not pørn; it’s ballet. She just kind of slowly stopped blogging.

I checked each week, but nothing new seemed to pop up.

Well, I think I have hit the same slump.

I have thought often about this blog. It has pretty much always been on my mind. I just couldn’t seem to find the energy to write anything.

Nothing has really changed since the last time I wrote. I am still going to class and I am still practising at home.

In some more interesting news, my Gaynor’s arrived!

I sewed on the ribbons, but I haven’t managed to sew on the elastics. I forgot just how much of a pain it is to sew gaynors.

I know gaynors aren’t meant to change at all, but I have this weird feeling that they aren’t the same as my old gaynors. Maybe it is all in my head.

I haven’t practiced in them yet. I think I would like to get a new PVC floor just for them. I have some PVC flooring over the space I use for ballet practice, but it gets pretty dirty because I just leave it there all the time. I would like to try to keep my gaynors as clean as possible.

I heard a bit of news from my old studio. Looks like they are pretty far along now with their rehearsals for the next recital. It’s weird not being apart of it. A very small part of me feels like I am missing out, but a big part is pretty relieved I don’t have to worry about it.

I am starting to feel a bit anxious for the up coming summer holidays. I started looking around to see if there was any chance at all that a studio in my city might be offering classes, but it doesn’t seem so.

If someone did, I bet they would make a heap of money!

Hope you have all been well.

Until next time… whenever that may be 😛



Week 116 – No ballet, No Gaynors

It’s been a bad week for ballet over here.

Having no class for 2 weeks has really taken a toll on me.

It feels like with every class I have missed I have lost a part of my motivation.

I am still concentrating at home on my two big goals, pirouettes and pointe.

I really have no excuses. If I couldn’t make it to class because of public holidays or whatever reason, I could have taken a Kathryn Morgan at home class.

I emailed my teach about the missed classes, and asked if there was any way to take a different class to make up for it. I mean, I did pay for those classes after all. She said no problem.

Hopefully I can find a way to recover them.

I also don’t understand if I am still meant to pay for my classes every month even during the summer holidays. Thats going to be 6 weeks worth of classes!

I will have to find out.

On the Gaynor Minden front, I haven’t heard anything.

I called the shop today and the girl on the phone wasn’t sure what I was talking about. I guess I didn’t explain myself well, but it seems like she couldn’t find my name in the system.

She suggested emailing again, so i’ll do that again now.

Hope you all had a more motivating week!

Week 115 – Bad Blogger

I managed to blog almost weekly for 2 years… but I have slipped.

I have just been working so much.

It’s funny, because I was working just as much, maybe even more, when I did that 12 week challenge a year or so ago.

I guess I have just been a slacker.

To be honest, there is not much to report.

I didn’t go to class last week because my little kitty got herself hurt and I had to go with her to the vet. I was too shaken to think about going to class.

This week class isn’t happening because it is a public holiday here in Germany.

The only ballet things I have been doing is what I have been doing at home.

Every time I have had a day off, which isn’t too often, I have been doing my pirouette practice and pointe work.

Most evenings I have been doing my feet and ankle strengthening workout.

I was planning on trying out another class at the dance centre on Monday, but now I am doing a first aid course then.

It would be great if that course worked out. It is at 10:30 in the morning, goes for an hour and a half and is pretty affordable. The dance centre is meant to be pretty expensive, but I guess the class isn’t that expensive because of the time it is at.

I am hoping to try it before the dance centre closes for the summer holidays.

Still no update on my gaynors..

Hope you all had a lovely week!

Week 114 – School, Comfi, and Germany’s next top model

Part and parcel of taking class with teens is that the topic of conversation often drifts away from ballet.

As a result, I have heard way more than I wanted to about school life, preparing for confirmation, and about who the favourites are for Germany’s next top model.

I guess that is the sacrifice I have to make if I want to take class with people who are 10 years younger than me!

My teacher mentioned this week that we had now run through all the exercises for Intermediate Foundation. Well, at least all the exercises on flat.

I know the other girls in the class have pointe class as well during the week, so I am assuming the teacher might be rehearsing the pointe parts with them.

Nonetheless, I am still doing some pointe work at home. The „My Beginner Pointe“ DVD suggests doing stage 1 for a minimum of two times a week for 6 months. I just hit the 4 month mark.

I can feel myself getting a lot stronger in terms of not only strength itself, but technique. I made a lot of improvement when I realised that when I had my barre in front of the mirror I tended to look down at what my feet were doing. This threw my balance off.

My barre is still in front of the mirror, but I now make a conscious effort not to look unless necessary.

You might remember from a few weeks ago that I wanted to get new Gaynors. Well, the shop said they would order them and send me the invoice in the next few days. It’s been 6 weeks and no invoice! I email them again..but I haven’t received a reply.

I hope everything is ok with them!

I guess I need to call.

Sorry about the very very late post this week. I am meant to be working part time at my new job, but I have full time hours at the moment.

Hope you all had a lovely week!

Week 113 – Freedom through dance

I’m not sure if I mentioned it, but I started a new part time job about a month ago.

It is a type of reception job, which I have done many times before. However, this is a new experience for me because I have never done it before in Germany.

English is my first language, but my German isn’t too bad.

Starting a new job is hard anyway, but I am slowly realising that the place I am working at has a bad atmosphere. Everyone there is unhappy with their jobs and moan a lot.

To top it off though, 3 different people have mentioned that I look timid.

I don’t have very high self-esteem anyway, so this has all left me feeling a bit sad.

Contrary to my last post, I definitely don’t feel like I am making the most of life at the moment.

I definitely consider myself an introvert, and a sensitive one at that, but I feel like I have been doing a good job at my new workplace.

Anyway, what has this got to do with ballet?

Well, I have to say that I am hugely thankful that I have ballet as an escape.

Although I am not taking as many lessons as I would like, the two hours a week that I do have have really saved me.

I really don’t know what I did to escape before my obsession with ballet came to life.

I feel like the whole routine of putting on tights, a leo, and a pair of pink slippers calming.

I know that when I step into the studio we will start with pliés.

I can forget about the day, or week, and concentrate on pointing my toes or maintaining a balance.

This week was a bit of a low for me. But as they say, there are no highs without the lows.


Week 112 – Life is Short

I received some really sad news today.

My dance partner from last years recital passed away.

I am just in shock.

He taught me so much.

I can remember when my teacher told me I was going to dance with him. I was so shy at first. I couldn’t even look him in the eye.

Slowly, his confidence encouraged me to come out of my little shell and to try and loose myself in my character.

I would never have been able to match him though. The audience just loved him. Even I just wanted to sit back and watch him perform.

He was only at our little studio for a short time. He left to start his own theatre project in another country.

The last time I saw him he was happy and smiling.

We never know how much time we have on this earth. We just have to try and make the most of it.

Week 111 – Looking like a Ballerina

When coming up with names for my blog I thought of many different combinations. I settled on imitation ballerina because it summed up what my goal was at the time. I knew I would never actually ever be a ballerina, but I could try my best to look like one, right?

Well, it looks like I am well on my way! haha

Earlier this week my aunty said she showed a photo of me to one of her friends and her friend apparently said „She looks like a ballerina!“

and no, she didn’t know that I did ballet

and no, I wasn’t doing any ballet-y things in the photo.

It was just my upper body.


Then to top it off, later in the week someone at work asked if I do ballet. Though this time I am guilty of doing something ballet-y. I was standing on my tippy toes to serve customers over the desk.

He said I was doing it so confidently.

So, Yay!

Other than that, I didn’t do too many ballet related things this week.

On my days off from work (I only work part time now), I have been alternating between a day of perfecting my pirouettes and a day of doing pointe work.

My dedication definitely took a beating after coming back from holidays.

By pointe work, I mean the Level 1 pointe work from the my beginner pointe work DVD. They recommend doing Level 1 for a minimum of 6 months. If I minus my holiday, and the few weeks I didn’t do anything, than I am really only about 3 months in.

Next week I am hoping to do another private with my company contact. It will probably be the last one 😦

Hope you all had a lovely week!