Week 115 – Bad Blogger

I managed to blog almost weekly for 2 years… but I have slipped.

I have just been working so much.

It’s funny, because I was working just as much, maybe even more, when I did that 12 week challenge a year or so ago.

I guess I have just been a slacker.

To be honest, there is not much to report.

I didn’t go to class last week because my little kitty got herself hurt and I had to go with her to the vet. I was too shaken to think about going to class.

This week class isn’t happening because it is a public holiday here in Germany.

The only ballet things I have been doing is what I have been doing at home.

Every time I have had a day off, which isn’t too often, I have been doing my pirouette practice and pointe work.

Most evenings I have been doing my feet and ankle strengthening workout.

I was planning on trying out another class at the dance centre on Monday, but now I am doing a first aid course then.

It would be great if that course worked out. It is at 10:30 in the morning, goes for an hour and a half and is pretty affordable. The dance centre is meant to be pretty expensive, but I guess the class isn’t that expensive because of the time it is at.

I am hoping to try it before the dance centre closes for the summer holidays.

Still no update on my gaynors..

Hope you all had a lovely week!

Week 114 – School, Comfi, and Germany’s next top model

Part and parcel of taking class with teens is that the topic of conversation often drifts away from ballet.

As a result, I have heard way more than I wanted to about school life, preparing for confirmation, and about who the favourites are for Germany’s next top model.

I guess that is the sacrifice I have to make if I want to take class with people who are 10 years younger than me!

My teacher mentioned this week that we had now run through all the exercises for Intermediate Foundation. Well, at least all the exercises on flat.

I know the other girls in the class have pointe class as well during the week, so I am assuming the teacher might be rehearsing the pointe parts with them.

Nonetheless, I am still doing some pointe work at home. The „My Beginner Pointe“ DVD suggests doing stage 1 for a minimum of two times a week for 6 months. I just hit the 4 month mark.

I can feel myself getting a lot stronger in terms of not only strength itself, but technique. I made a lot of improvement when I realised that when I had my barre in front of the mirror I tended to look down at what my feet were doing. This threw my balance off.

My barre is still in front of the mirror, but I now make a conscious effort not to look unless necessary.

You might remember from a few weeks ago that I wanted to get new Gaynors. Well, the shop said they would order them and send me the invoice in the next few days. It’s been 6 weeks and no invoice! I email them again..but I haven’t received a reply.

I hope everything is ok with them!

I guess I need to call.

Sorry about the very very late post this week. I am meant to be working part time at my new job, but I have full time hours at the moment.

Hope you all had a lovely week!

Week 113 – Freedom through dance

I’m not sure if I mentioned it, but I started a new part time job about a month ago.

It is a type of reception job, which I have done many times before. However, this is a new experience for me because I have never done it before in Germany.

English is my first language, but my German isn’t too bad.

Starting a new job is hard anyway, but I am slowly realising that the place I am working at has a bad atmosphere. Everyone there is unhappy with their jobs and moan a lot.

To top it off though, 3 different people have mentioned that I look timid.

I don’t have very high self-esteem anyway, so this has all left me feeling a bit sad.

Contrary to my last post, I definitely don’t feel like I am making the most of life at the moment.

I definitely consider myself an introvert, and a sensitive one at that, but I feel like I have been doing a good job at my new workplace.

Anyway, what has this got to do with ballet?

Well, I have to say that I am hugely thankful that I have ballet as an escape.

Although I am not taking as many lessons as I would like, the two hours a week that I do have have really saved me.

I really don’t know what I did to escape before my obsession with ballet came to life.

I feel like the whole routine of putting on tights, a leo, and a pair of pink slippers calming.

I know that when I step into the studio we will start with pliés.

I can forget about the day, or week, and concentrate on pointing my toes or maintaining a balance.

This week was a bit of a low for me. But as they say, there are no highs without the lows.


Week 112 – Life is Short

I received some really sad news today.

My dance partner from last years recital passed away.

I am just in shock.

He taught me so much.

I can remember when my teacher told me I was going to dance with him. I was so shy at first. I couldn’t even look him in the eye.

Slowly, his confidence encouraged me to come out of my little shell and to try and loose myself in my character.

I would never have been able to match him though. The audience just loved him. Even I just wanted to sit back and watch him perform.

He was only at our little studio for a short time. He left to start his own theatre project in another country.

The last time I saw him he was happy and smiling.

We never know how much time we have on this earth. We just have to try and make the most of it.

Week 111 – Looking like a Ballerina

When coming up with names for my blog I thought of many different combinations. I settled on imitation ballerina because it summed up what my goal was at the time. I knew I would never actually ever be a ballerina, but I could try my best to look like one, right?

Well, it looks like I am well on my way! haha

Earlier this week my aunty said she showed a photo of me to one of her friends and her friend apparently said „She looks like a ballerina!“

and no, she didn’t know that I did ballet

and no, I wasn’t doing any ballet-y things in the photo.

It was just my upper body.


Then to top it off, later in the week someone at work asked if I do ballet. Though this time I am guilty of doing something ballet-y. I was standing on my tippy toes to serve customers over the desk.

He said I was doing it so confidently.

So, Yay!

Other than that, I didn’t do too many ballet related things this week.

On my days off from work (I only work part time now), I have been alternating between a day of perfecting my pirouettes and a day of doing pointe work.

My dedication definitely took a beating after coming back from holidays.

By pointe work, I mean the Level 1 pointe work from the my beginner pointe work DVD. They recommend doing Level 1 for a minimum of 6 months. If I minus my holiday, and the few weeks I didn’t do anything, than I am really only about 3 months in.

Next week I am hoping to do another private with my company contact. It will probably be the last one 😦

Hope you all had a lovely week!

Week 110 – Saying Goodbye

Tuesday this week marked my final class at my old studio. It felt a bit weird.

Every combination I did reminded me that it would be the last time I would have to do it. If I messed it up, there was no second chance next week.

It didn’t bother me too much.

I mentioned to a few of the other girls in class, who I don’t talk to that often, that I am leaving. One woman said „You’re joking right?“

They asked why, and I just said that I have another class on Thursdays and I don’t have time anymore.

I’m not sure they bought it.

Anyway, I originally thought of skipping pointe and leaving after class. That way the teacher could start directly with rehearsing the recital piece.

However, the woman who is doing the pointe piece on her own asked me to stay. So I decided to stay just for barre.

After Pointe Barre I went up to my teacher and thanked her for everything and said goodbye. She said that it was a shame I was leaving.

I said that I would definitely come and watch the recital. She said „No, you should be doing it with us!“

I just laughed.

And that was it.

I left the studio I had been at for the past two years.

I felt a sense of relief.

This decision had been bugging me for ages.

That also happened to be my last ballet class for the next couple of weeks because of the school holidays.

I was meant to go to class on Thursday, but I felt too sick.

I felt so sick that I basically stayed in bed for the next few days.

I think I might do a couple of Kathryn Morgan’s classes at home once I feel better so I’m not too out of shape after the easter holiday break!

Hope you all had a happy and healthy week!

Week 109 – Big Girl Pants part 2

Even though I am generally the type of person who tries to avoid confrontation (but then broods over what I might have said later), I felt particularly brave on Tuesday evening.

If class had been enjoyable I might have chickened out for another week, but class left me feeling the same way at has for the past few months…unhappy.

So I found the courage after pointe class and went up to the teacher and told her that my 10er card was finishing next week and that I would like to try something new after it. She listened intently as I spoke, but in the end she just said something like „Of course, you are welcome back here anytime“

And that was it..

I have seen many a girl leave the studio, and the teacher has generally looked sad. However, I feel like she just kind of accepted that I was leaving. I have been there for two years, I guess I was just expecting more of a response from her…

Maybe that will come this coming Tuesday?

Like I said, class was generally underwhelming. I did a few pointe exercises at the barre and in the center before I felt my ankle hurt. So I sat to the side and watched the other girls dance.

After pointe class my teacher started rehearsing the end of year performance with the one girl who is left.

This week I also started communicating with the store I bought my Gaynor Mindens from. I think I am going to go back to them when my last pair of Freed’s die.

I know, I know. This blog is full of me going back and forth between pointe shoes.

This time I became convinced to try Gaynor’s in my Syllabus classes because of a documentary series on youtube called „Ballet a la Russe“

Above is episode 1.

Pretty much all the Russian Ballerina’s I see are wearing Gaynors.

I think I am in store for another 6 week wait because of my weird shoe size. Apparently not many people with a narrow foot want a number 4 box.

On Thursday I, luckily, made the decision to double check with my teacher if it was ok to have leather on the platform of the shoes, or if I should stick with Satin.

Most Gaynor’s I have seen are with leather on the platform.

She said that she prefers Satin, because the floor at the studio makes leather tipped pointe shoes stick too much.

So I have ordered Gaynors with the satin platform in the same size as my old ones. This time I am going to use the instant Wings. I think they are going to make the shoe hug my foot even better. At the moment I just have the box liner, but that only covers the box (obviously) and not the metatarsals.

You might be asking, why can’t you just wear your current pair of gaynors there? Thats because the platform and underside of my shoes are completely black from the old studio floor. The beautiful pink satin is also marked with black stains. I also pancaked them with white shoe polish to make them look a little more acceptable.

The new studio has beautifully clean white floors. I don’t want to come in with my dirty shoes!

And.. I just want pretty new ones so I can start fresh.

In IF this week we focused on adding in the arms to the second petit allegro combination we worked on last week. It felt nearly impossible to focus on all that once. However, by the third attempt, I felt a little more coordinated.

Despite my teacher saying that she wanted to rotate between doing class on flat and en pointe, she hasn’t implemented it yet.

In my second class we repeated the combinations we learnt last week.

This time around the petit allegro that I struggled with last week felt so much easier! I think the tempo was a little slower than last week, but I still felt like I had improved.

I haven’t had much of a chance to do much at home. I started a new job and have been completely tired every evening.

I did however find time to sew my new Freed’s and break them in. I feel soo much more supported now. Though, getting over the box isn’t as easy as before 😛

I also haven’t had a chance to arrange another private yet.

Life just sometimes gets in the way.

Hope you all had a lovely week!